Happy New Year – 2021

Hey, how is everyone doing? I hope the first few days of the new year have been treating you well so far.

So far the first few days for me have been fairly good, I haven’t set any new years resolutions for this year, mainly because I feel very soon we will be back into a national lockdown so it seems kind of pointless. Although I do have things I want to aim for and things I want to achieve but I don’t like to share them, or even have them written down, as then I am less likely to do it. It just feels too much pressure to have specific things written down, but I know what I want to do/achieve but also if I don’t that’s totally cool as well because we’re all still stuck in such a weird time and feels like nothings really moving forward very far. I am quite happy with how my life is moving forward anyway right now and even though I initially found lockdown really hard, I am actually really loving my own company, like I am really enjoying it.

New Years day was extremely quite, even though I didn’t actually get to bed that late, I was so exhausted! That all I could manage for most of the day was sleeping and resting, not a terrible way to spend the first day of the new year though. But I did cook up the rest of the veg I had left over from Christmas so it didn’t go to waste, the last of which I will have tonight for dinner, can’t beat a good roast dinner!

Yesterday I did the housework and took the dogs for a walk around the Quay, which I forced myself to do, as it was cold and I was exhausted. But with fatigue its such a catch 22 situation, the less I do the more I’m exhausted but on the flip side if I do too much, I’m also exhausted! So I am making a conscious effort to try and walk a little more every day and try and build my energy levels back up a bit. It’s going to be hard but I’ve done it before, however I am fighting against a under active thyroid as well at the moment, so it may not go quite to plan.

After our walk, I got in and had a rest for a bit before cracking on with some paperwork for my disability benefits. The form filling service needed some information before the phone call, which will help with filling it in, so I spent 2 hours sorting through everything and writing down all the information they needed. I hate sorting through this crap, its so emotionally exhausting and draining!

I treated myself to a Pizza hut for dinner, as I was just too tired to cook or even think about cooking. I had a nice surprise and my friend B video called me, which was lovely as we’d not done that in years! We spent about an hour and a half catching up which was really lovely.

After my video call, it was back to finishing off sorting through the paperwork and I emailed the form filling service with all the information they wanted and holy shit! I felt so much better for having that all done and sorted! The benefits process is so long and draining, but I am so glad I am not doing it alone, because I would just put it off till the last second! Because I hate it so much!

I was so tired after all that I decided to get ready for bed and watched the Simpsons curled up in bed with my 4 fur babies, a perfect way to end a productive day.

Today has been a pretty good day and I am really proud of myself! It was so hard to get going, as its been so cold and grey today, I mean when isn’t it in the UK LOL! But it does make it much harder to get motivated to want to do anything.

I did eventually get myself up, showered, dressed and fed I had peanut butter and honey porridge which I am obsessed with! So tasty and filling. I then got the dogs ready and took them across the road for a run around, Foxy wasn’t overly impressed because she was getting cold. She did what she needed to do and she was done lol. We went back home and the whole time I was trying to decided whether or not to take Scrappy out for a longer walk on his own, but that meant walking further from home… which is something I have been really struggling to do.

We got in and I was going back and forth in my head and decided fuck it! I’m not doing this for me, I’m doing it because Scrappy loves going for long walks and being by the sea. So we went… I did nearly have a panic attack as we got further away from home but I managed to control it and carry on. Once we got down to the sea I felt so much better, I was still feeling a bit tense but I tried to focus on taking pictures and playing fetch with Scrappy. I was just trying to enjoy the moment and watching Scrappy run, play and swim always helps. He’s always so happy whatever he’s doing and that always makes me smile.

I had a great walk with my boy, all be it a chilly walk lol and I am SO proud of myself for pushing myself to get out and not turning back when the panic attack kicked it, but it did not win! We got back in and I made myself a nice cuppa to warm up and curled up on the sofa with a film.

I didn’t come on the laptop to blog initially… but here we are! I still have a few bits to sort out for my disability benefits, which is actually what I came on here to do. I need copies of all the information I need to send, but I still have this evening and tomorrow that I can sort that stuff out. It’s not too much of a rush to get done.

I’m actually feeling pretty good, that walk did me the world of good and also getting so much sorted regarding my disability benefits, I feel like I have some sort of control over the situation.

Life under lockdown has been far from easy but I am so proud that I’ve been able to mange and handle all the change and deal with everything its thrown at me and taken away from and I’ve still come out fighting and smiling. Although some days it does and has gotten the better of me but I mean that’s the nature of living with chronic depression that would happen in any situation. I don’t think my younger self would have been able to deal with this at all, I definitely think that a younger me would have given up, because younger me needed to be around other people to feel like a valid human. Me now at age 35 (very nearly 36) has finally realised that the only person that I need to be happy with is myself, I am the only one I will have a life long relationship with, so it better be a good one! I am valid, worthy and loved all by myself! I don’t need outside validation for that anymore, I know exactly who I am now and I am freaking awesome! I am happy on my own and I know whatever else is thrown at me, I am capable of dealing with on my own.

Here’s a few pictures from the first few days of this year

That’s all for now,

Peace out

Zak

A day in the life of a trans guy – How I prepared for top surgery.

I thought it might be helpful to write about how I prepared for top surgery, as I don’t think there’s enough information out there about it. There’s lots on the surgery itself and not much about post surgery, especially if you don’t have family to support you.

As soon as I got my date for surgery, I wrote a list a big list of everything I thought I would need and what I would need to do running up to surgery. I’m a bit of a control freak, so I’m pretty good and planning and organising myself and being over-prepared.

I also have 2 cats and 2 dogs, who are my absolute world so I needed to make sure not only was I prepared but they were also going to be cared for and had everything they needed.

LISTS! cannot express enough about how helpful lists are and also feels great when you finally get stuff ticked off. Plus they are a great visual aid to see how much you need to get and for me its just a great way to help organise my brain and figure out when I need to get things and in what order.

I belong to a great facebook group called TMSA social and support, they have two separate groups. They have files for surgeons which is where I picked mine from and everyone is super friendly and were so helpful when I asked for advice about what I needed post op top surgery. Highly recommend this group.

So here is what I bought and organised for top surgery pre and post op.

One of the hardest things was asking for help, I created a FB group chat with friends asking for help, I needed a lift to my pre op appointment and back, then a lift to hospital for surgery and a lift home again. I needed someone to stay at my house and look after my fur babies. I needed people to come over and help me take the dogs out, help with housework etc.

Everyone was amazing I got the support I needed, which was amazing. I had friends who took me back and forth to the hospital for my pre op appointment, surgery itself, post surgery and post surgery check up appointments. I also had friends stay at my flat and look after my fur babies, who had the best time.

Unfortunately I didn’t really have the support once I was back home, which sucked but I managed. I did have a couple of friends who came over and cooked for me, which was great but I was hoping for a little more help. Maybe I expected a bit too much, but I’ve made my peace with this all now.

I bought myself a amazon fire tablet, heaphones and microSD card, so I could download films to watch while I was in hospitals. I’m glad I bought it, it came in real useful, I watched quite a lot of films.

After surgery you aren’t allowed to shower for a while, so I bought some Clinitex body wipes from amazon and man am I so glad I did they were amazing, they made me feel pretty clean. I definitely recommend them.

I bought slippers and a dressing gown but I didn’t actually end up needing them, as they were provided but if in your paperwork they suggest them I’d buy them just in case, that’s if you don’t already own them.

I bought 2XL vest tops to wear after surgery, as it was in August and they were easy to slip on and off. I wore zipped hoodies as they were easy to get on and off too, as after you have limited movement in your arms for a few weeks. I bought the vest tops from Primark as they were only £2 each.

I am on lots of different prescribed medications and over the counter medications. I asked my GP for 2 months worth of all my meds so I didn’t have to worry to much about them and then I made sure I had enough of my over the counter medications, paracetamol, sinus rinse and vitamins.

I am on a key meter for my electric, so over the weeks running up to surgery I kept adding more then I usually put on my electric, so I knew I would be covered, same with my rent, I made sure I put extra money on my rent too.

I stocked up on basic household stuff, toilet rolls, washing up liquids, you know the boring adult household stuffs lol!

(NOTE I did a lot of stocking up no stuff! lol)

I stocked up on dog/cat food, cat litter, poop bags, treats.. again general stuff I would normally get to care for my gorgeous fur babies.

As I had a few friends stay over, I made labels for all the cupboards so it was easy for them to find stuff. I also made a list of instructions for the fur babies and just general information…yeah I said I was a bit of a control freak, which stems from anxiety.

I love my incense sticks and candles so I made sure I had them in.

I have a battery pack I took to charge my phone at tablet whilst I was in hospital, I made sure that was fully charged the day before I had surgery.

I made sure I had snacks, drinks and easy to make food in the flat. I mainly ate snacks and takeaways lol!

I bought these great hydration tablets O.R.S hydration tablets from amazon, they were great and I still use them now, especially for days I don’t drink enough.

These last few things were probably the most helpful of all.

So after surgery you aren’t meant to lay flat for a while, so I bought two V shaped pillows, two regular pillows and a memory foam neck pillow.

The neck pillow came in handy whilst I was in hospital after surgery, I used it when I was sleeping and it made the whole experience more comfortable.

The V pillows and two other pillows were great for when I was at home recovering, I spent 4/5 weeks sleeping on the sofa, as it was just the most comfortable place for me.

I honestly can’t say enough at how much those 3 particular pillows helped so much.

So for me that was is really, I’m pretty good at self care and looking after myself, so that part wasn’t too hard.

I couldn’t have done it without spending months of organising and planning, without the people who helped me.

If you’ve found this helpful, please feel free to share and use this as a guide to going through top surgery.

Peace out

Zak

I am still a work in process – update on life.

WOW so it has been a long old few weeks since I last posted and a lot has happened.

First of all I would like to say that I cannot believe I have kept my shit together, despite all the trials and tribulations I have been through recently. If this was to happen to me say 4-5 years ago then I would have lost my shit ages ago and I would have self harmed A LOT! But I have kept as calm as I could and I’ve not self harmed at all, which proves to me that I’ve grown and that I do not fit the BPD diagnosis any longer.

Um so where to start….

So Scrappy had another trip to the vets last week as he was still poorly but not as bad as his first trip to the vets, so he was given something to balance all the good bacteria in his stomach and it worked really well and he was back to his usual self in no time at all. The vet suggested he be muzzled when he’s out to prevent him from eating shit he’s not meant too. My friend took us to get him a muzzle and it will be ok for now but he can get it off but hopefully he’ll get used to it. All my other fur babies are absolutely fine 🙂

Medical stuff – I saw my new ENT doc and he was ok, he has ordered me a CT scan of my sinuses to see where we go from there and antibiotics until we know what the next step is. He also did me a letter for my PIP.

I also saw my GP and he is doing my referral to Dr Edwards in Southampton hospital! woohoo! FINALLY! He also gave me some naproxen for me knees as they keep swelling up and are really painful.

Disability benefits stuff – So I have been working really hard on writing my appeal as the Personal Independent Payment people have refused my mandatory reconsideration, I feel I was penalised because it was in late, which was not in my control as I had a charity helping me and it was their responsibility, I have since had an apology from the charity but I am still planning on making a official complaint about it. But anyway the appeal has been written and amended by someone who knows what the requirements are etc and its absolutely spot on. It’s all slowly coming together and I will be able to post it on Monday.

Sorting this out has had a huge impact on my physical and mental health and my ability to do anything. I’ve missed a lot of my groups and counselling, I’ve been quite isolated and lonely. I’ve struggled just to do day to day tasks because I have been so tired, in so much pain and feeling far too overwhelmed, even taking a shower feels too much. It has certainly taken a massive toll on me and this whole process has been a huge trigger for the deep routed anger that is inside me.

This whole process has brought up a lot of stuff and has bought up a load of thoughts about all the times I’ve been let down by nearly everyone in my life, at every crucial moment in my life. My core memories aren’t all happy, great memories, they are mostly negative with a bit of trauma thrown in. I am feeling a lot of anger and I don’t know how to get rid of it in a normal healthy way, I know I am on the right path because I know I need to do something about this anger in a healthy way and my behaviour hasn’t been destructive at all, which is a vast improvement since I completed DBT. I just need to work out how to process it, where to start, what do I do?! I will meditate on it, look up ways to process deep routed anger and see where we go from here. I think though I need to stop fighting and rest, my fight, flight or freeze is stuck in fight mode just to get me through all this but, I need to stop for a bit, stop fighting and just be, that will be easier said then done, as I have spent a lot of time in fight mode recently just to get through each day!

How do I feel right now? I feel emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually exhausted. I need to rest and I will, I need to tend to all my needs and listen to my inner child and what he needs, this reminds me I want to learn more about this and re-parenting my inner child etc.

Just writing this has helped a bit but now I need to eat something and sleep 🙂

But just before I go, here are a few pictures of me and my babies ❤

^^ Marley Moo

^^ Harley playing with her new toys that my lovely friend made 🙂

^^ My beautiful Foxy girl

^^ My photography

^^ Scrappy doodles love swimming in the sea 🙂

^^ Me, I actually quite like this picture of me.

Peace out

Batman

*insert*title*for*a*happy*boy

I can’t believe its Wednesday again already, so crazy this week’s just flown past. It has been a good week so far 🙂

Monday I was on it like sonic! Cleaned the flat, sorted out all my paper work and made phone calls. I rang social services so I can get some equipment for the flat that I need to help me. They are going to ring back and go through a form to see if I qualify for help. I also rang my housing association to sort out getting permission for the dogs, again they will ring me back. I need to chase up both. I rang the hospital to see if I can get my appointment brought forward but they have no spaces, so she said if I need to be seen sooner then ask my GP to write them a letter to ask if I can be slotted in sooner. So I need to check that he’s done that if he thinks that’s what is needed…hopefully he does lol. Um I think that was all the phones calls I made, I’m really glad it’s all been started. I’m nervous about the social services involvement as I don’t want them to say I need more help then I think I need… that’s my only worry.

Mon eve I went to flirt to meet some peeps 🙂 which was nice. On the bus back I felt a bit hot and sicky though… so chilled on the sofa with the babies for a bit before taking them out.

Tuesday was good, I spent the day with L, boo and all the pups. My bro and Leo popped to see us too. We spent sometime in the park just chatting and watching the dogs playing. Then we went to flirt for lunch as it was getting a bit cold and it’s the only place in town that allow dogs inside. I had a nice jacket potato with cheese and beans 🙂 YUM! Lil boo fell asleep on the sofa in there bless him lil man, mind you it was nice and warm and after lunch me and L felt like dozing off in there lol.

When I got home, I was so tired I snuggled up on the sofa with the pups and fell asleep for a few hours. I went out and did my food shopping, just so it was done. Put it all away and had something to eat, took pups for a wee and went back to bed. I was utterly shattered, I didn’t sleep well Mon night I was really restless. But I did sleep really well Tues night.

Today has been really good, I had a friend from school over this morning for a bit with her lil boy, that was really nice and good to catch up 🙂 I waited about for my delivery and while I waited I watched tv, played on my tab etc just messed about.

I finally got my package 😀 it was moo’s new cat post! eeek it’s massive but it was pretty easy to put together 🙂 only took half an hour. Once that was sorted I took the old cat post down to the bins and took that apart. Went to Asda to pick up my new Lego Batman sets 😀 I need to find space before I can put them together though.

Made myself a nice spaghetti bolognese from scratch and that was so yummy and I’ve got some left over for 2 more dinner, so that’s cool.

Just been catching up on here this evening, pups are sleeping.

Feeling pretty good right now 🙂 feeling happy.

I’ve decided I’m going to do a video diary of my transition, I need to look up how I edit movies and stuff and how to do it on my laptop, so when the time comes to it I can do voice comparison videos etc. I think I need to look up more videos and what other guys talk about and maybe script a few too so I don’t forget anything and get everything out. So yeah pretty excited about it.

Peace out

Batman

Batman

Busy, happy boy :)

Wow the last 2 days have been so busy but they’ve been really good! My mood has picked up as has my motivation and over all I just feel a bit better 🙂

Yesterday I had my meeting for the voluntary job in which I was given a ton of paper work…. and I have got another appointment to do my DBS form, I asked her to fill it on for me other wise it will take me hours lol. But I am glad to have a new voluntary job, I feel important and have some sort of focus and purpose now.

I spent the afternoon with a friend, we had lunch and just hung out and chatted about stuff which was nice and she’s coming to stay with me this weekend, so looking forward to that.

I didn’t get home till about 7pm-ish, I had something to eat and drink and then I took the pups out down to the quay for a walk as it was biker night. Every Tues night bikers meet up on the quay. Foxy barks at the bikes lol its so funny, scrappy wasn’t even phased even though he’d never been to biker night before. We ended up being out for hours and we walked loads but it was really nice and I got some great pictures. Although it was really painful on my joints and I did sit down a few times it was so worth it, both the dogs and I needed it.

We got home at 9:30 pm and watched some TV for a bit, I was in bed by 10:30 pm just relaxing and it didn’t take long before we were all asleep.

For some reason I was up early again… But I did manage to get back to sleep for an hour or so. I just spent half the day messing about with the dogs, watching tv, I think I did have a nap, watching stuff on YouTube..

Eventually I got my butt up and started cleaning up the flat and I decided that the fridge and freezer needed sorting out and ended up defrosting the freezer, which took AGES! but it was fun chipping off the ice and making a mess lol. I did my usual bits, laundry, dishes etc.

I was chatting to some friends too through text and that, which was cool. One friend I’d not heard from a while text me I think yesterday, so that opened up the dialogue 🙂 Even though I haven’t actually seen anyone today, I haven’t been entirely isolated because people have been talking to me. This last week I have been less isolated, which has helped to pick up my mood.

After cleaning up, I had a shower and got dressed. After sorting through my food…well there wasn’t much in there lol and I’m going to start eating better, so I sat and did a shopping list and went to get it all. I put it all away and gave all the animals a treat.

Everything was aching so I sat down for a bit and just watched some tv. For dinner I made myself a ham and veg risotto, something I’ve not made in a long time but it was so yummy and got LOADS left over for another dinner. I’m going to try and eat a little better but I’m not going to stress to much over it….well that’s the plan lol! As a kid growing up at dinner time you sat down to eat a meal and I think now I still try and do that even though my appetite is totally different as an adult then when I was a kid. Now I graze and eat little and often and I don’t like to eat big meals and I need to get that into my head, that it’s ok to have a small meal or just whatever. I no longer need to eat a proper meal like I did as a kid. I’m hoping this will cause me less stress around food and eating.

I had a stack of paper work just making a mess everywhere and it really needed sorting through. I finally got round to it tonight! Woohoo lol, it’s taken me ages to do. But now I’m motivated what better time, so now it’s all done and some bits thrown away, some bits put away and a few bits filled out and ready to post tomorrow.

And then I came online. I wasn’t going to write much because I need to go to bed but I started to type and it all came tumbling out lol. Man I feel so good, this week has been great so far. My mood and motivation is UP and with dealing with the cleaning, paper work etc has also contributed to me feeling good 🙂 I hope this continues.

The only thing I’m not liking at the moment is having dreams about being a genetic guy… but waking up and not being a genetic guy really sucks. I wish they would stop, well the dreams are cool but the waking up to reality isn’t. But whatever…stupid brain lol.

A few pictures

Peace out

Batman

A lil bit more motivated

I’ll start by saying my anger and anxiety over the elections has lessened now. But it’s got me wanting to be much more involved with it all, so I am going to look into how I go about doing something to help create change.

I do have some good news though 🙂 my motivation is back! well it’s better then it was. So I’ve actually had a really good weekend and I didn’t spend it all at home.

Yesterday I had a chilled morning, as I’m always a bit drowsy the day after my metoject. But I was up and out with the pups by 1 pm. We walked down to the quay where there was a boat show, there were massive ships that looked like pirate ships, so cool! It was really busy and hotter then it looked. I met up with my bro his gf and baby Leo for a bit, we sat and had lunch down by where we scattered dad. That was nice to be down there altogether in a special, beautiful place, while watching the pups play and scrappy went for a swim. They left to meet and friend and I carried on walking with the pups around our usual route and that was fun. It was busy because of the boat show and the nice weather. We didn’t get back till 5 pm and I had a red face, neck, ears and arms lol!

I hung out with some friends in the evening which was alright, kinda shouldn’t have gone because half way back on the bus I felt ROUGH as…I think it was heat/sun stroke. I felt so sick and everything hurt. I didn’t get home late late so I led on the sofa with my puppies because urgh I felt awful and I sipped on some water too. I felt a little bit better after a rest and was able to take the pups for a pee and get us all to bed.

Slept really well last night, not surprisingly after all the walking and that I did yesterday. I spent this morning until about 1 pm just relaxing and sleeping 🙂

I did eventually get my butt up and I did clean up the flat a little bit, I’m going to start doing what I did before I lost my motivation and that was cleaning every other day. So that made me feel good for getting that done. I got showered and that and I nipped down to the shop as I needed a few bits and bobs.

Had some lunch, did some laundry, played on my tab, watched some Daredevil on netflix and it’s not that bad. Just pottered about the flat sorting out different things around the place.

Spent an hour across the road with the pups, having a play about 🙂 that was nice just watching them play.

Spent this evening relaxing and the time had completely run away with me today!

Not doing much tomorrow, just got a few bits of paper work to sort out and I have my trans group in the evening, so looking forward to that 🙂

My mood has picked up a bit this weekend, I’m feeling less down and agitated and I am hoping I will be able to maintain this.

Some pictures of my weekend

Peace out

Batman

Over organised!

I think I am becoming nocturnal again…It’s 12:40 am and I am only just sitting down to relax and write. I am probably going to have another late night. I need to break this routine though.

Last night….well should I say this morning. I didn’t get to sleep till about 5 am. And I woke up 6 hours later…Urgh. I let scrappy out for a wee, I had a drink and we all went back to bed for a few hours.

Can’t remember what time I got up again. I think it was about midday. I sat about a bit, watching the tv. I eventually got showered and dressed. I took my lil pups across the road for a run about. I dropped them home and headed back into town.

Went to Argos and got myself a new little table to go next to the sofa, to fill the gap where the fish tank was. Now I don’t have a big coffee table in the middle of the lounge, that will do so people can put their drinks on etc. I had lunch in Burger King, as I realised it was 3:30 pm and I’d not eaten… So yeah treated myself. I got £15 left of my Christmas money. Not sure what I am going to do with it yet. I may get Lego Batman 2, so I will have all 3 games. Or I may get another Animal top….Will have a look in town tomorrow.

Got in and put the little table together. It only took half an hour. I’ve already got one like it and its pretty simple. Got a blister on my finger though from screwing all the bits in. Just chilled out for a bit, but my mind was busy with things I wanted to do.

With the new year coming I like to sort out what I need to get rid of, sell or throw away. So I sat and went through ALL my paper work. I was left with a massive pile. I really need to shred it before I throw it away…I was going to sit and cut it all up, but my head had other ideas.

I made myself some dinner before starting on my big task. It was ok….I wasn’t really hungry though.

I grabbed the baby wipes and went on a mission to dust all my shelves and Lego sets. I moved a few about as well. I wedged the bedroom door open and Miss Marely moo has been in here exploring as she’s not usually allowed in here. So all that dusting took a while, but my Lego looks better and are a bit more organised now.

Went into my bedroom, put a film on and sat and went through my pj draw, sock draw and boxer draw. As they were all overflowing lol. I had lots to throw out.

Then I went through my wardrobe. I sorted through all the tops and jeans that I wear and don’t wear or ones that just need throwing out. I had one t-shirt that still had tags on! I threw a few tops out, I got lots of tops to sell and one pair of jeans to sell. Everything is all nicely hung up again. I then went through my shoes. I got a pair of boots and shoes that I don’t wear, the rest I wear all the time. I went through all my hoodies and jumpers…as I have a few lol. I only had one to sell. But I did sort them out, hung them up etc. I have so much stuff! Bagged up the stuff that I was throwing out. I gave new homes to all the bits I got for Xmas. Put my new badges on my bag.

Sat and took pictures of everything I wanted to sell. I then went and got my laptop and sat on the bed. I uploaded all the pics to a selling site on fb and it took ages to write out the details and prices. I then sat and uploaded everything to a site called gumtree…that took SO long. But I hope it will be worth it. If nothing comes of it I think I will donate it all to the youth hostel I used to live in.

It’s taken me about an hour to sit and write. I’m starting to get a bit tired now. I think I will get myself to bed soon. I need to take the pups out first.

Feeling good. My head is just buzzing with things I want to do/get, but I got to wait till I get paid on Tues. My mind has been so busy lately. I thought it was just the Christmas period….I suppose my brain is preparing for the new years….Suppose if I get rid of extra baggage physically I will be able to do the same mentally…. I don’t know. I just want to be able to be truly at peace. Just be able to rest.

Physically I’m ok. Just the usual pain. Still feeling run down, but with my mind racing about I’ve not had much chance to rest.

Tomorrow I don’t have much planned….Although I do need to sort out the paper work. I need to destroy it some how…..may have to sit and rip it up. I want to go into town and have a look for a new top and maybe have lunch in burger king 🙂

Hopefully my brain will let me sleep peacefully and not wake up after 6 hours sleep.

My two pups are snuggled up with each other…they are BEAUTIFUL and Miss Marley moo is snuggled up on the end of the bed ❤

Peace out

Batman